Hey, PC. Let me preface by saying that these observations are purely my own (bkox is perfectly capable of speaking for himself), and that I also agree with andyb and AF. But I think a larger point may being missed in favor of focusing solely on julio's post here, falling back also on the good overall character of the community populating the board. Certainly, I see no one arguing against the latter.
I want to say as well that I've got no specific axe to grind personally with julio. I respect his views, and have learned a good amount from his posts over the years, as I have from others here. But I also feel his propensity to talk down to others at times is unnecessary and has turned good posters away. I've been fully comfortable giving him that feedback in hopes he'll course correct and no one takes unnecessary offense, But this isn't always successful.
Obviously, julio's words triggered an emotional response from bkox. It's easy to see bkox's as an overreaction within the context of just that post (ignoring the comments pointing to it being a pattern of behavior). But even it was, it isn't entirely uncommon for a 'final straw'-type moment to elicit a reaction that dwarfs the perceived infraction itself, because of the weight of the words or actions that preceded it. So whitewashing julio's condescension and dismissing bkox as simply taking things too personally to me seems a bit obtuse. I mean, I've been a member of the board for over 21 years; you were part of the community before Dave even founded it. I'd find it hard to believe you haven't seen examples of similar posts from julio in the past.
Another reason his down-talking bothers me is because I'd really like to maintain (even gain) participation on this board. You said above that online forums have hundreds of posters - this one doesn't. Without looking I would say we have 25, maybe 30, regular and semi-regular posters. While growing the community would be great, I often wonder where we'll be when the likes of you, julio, and allentown - along with other OG members here - decide to hang up the spikes. I'd like to think we'll still have robust group to carry things, but am unsure whether that will be the case.
Point being, we have the size to tend to our members, if not the compassion and dedication to civil discourse. You mentioned that in these times we should allow others the occasional misstep, and I don't disagree. But I also think taking the time to extend a simple 'thank you' or 'I'm sorry' on occasion goes a long way as well. Yes, disagreements are inevitable, but losing good posters like bkox in a manner like this is a real shame, and didn't have to happen.